All of a sudden, Iggy pulls out the Coalition Option. Layton said last week he’s willing to jump into bed with anybody (my words, not his). Seems like Harper was the only one telling the truth all along. Surprise, surprise.

Iggy now says he’s ruling out any form of coalition, unless there’s a Harper minority. Wait, what? If there was a Harper majority, there’s obviously no reason to form a coalition. And the Harper minority is the only reason you could form a coalition. So what you’re really saying is, is that you’re going to form a coalition. Period.

If this isn’t reason enough to elect a majority Harper government, I don’t know what is.

So, the campaign promises have started. Already the collective Opposition leaders have promised about $1B per day. Where this money comes from no one knows, but hey, it’s a campaign, and Canadians have been known to believe a promise or two (remember the GST?).

After attaching the government on the so called “in and out” scheme, both Iggy and Jackie themselves are offering a sort of in-and-out scheme to the taxpayers. Yesterday Iggy came up with the most complicated, convoluted scheme to “help” students with some sort of $4000 (or something) grant in some sort of program (if I am being vague, well, it’s because no-one understands the damn thing). One university professor (didn’t catch his name) said on the radio yesterday, that, while complicated, it basically means nothing more than taking something away from some students and giving it to other students, using programs already in place (like the RESPs), the net result being zero. In and out.

Today Jackie came out swinging saying he’d lower taxes for small business, but to pay for it, he’d raise taxes on corporations. I guess no-one told him that most small businesses are corporations, providing most of the jobs (at least here in Ontario). You know that nail-salon you go to, next to the Lebanese pizza place? Well, both of them are corporations. And so are all the other small businesses in that strip mall. They will get a lower tax through his small business cuts, and then pay more tax through his corporation raise. Sounds a lot like an in-and-out scheme to me.

Lizzy May is talking to a lawyer so she may, once again, act like a spoiled child and scream through everybody around the discussion table at the National Debates (that are somehow directed by “The Broadcast Consortium”, a term one only hears during electoral debates, thankfully).

And Gilles? Well, Gilles is in Quebec. Big surprise.

We’re on day -2 of the federal election, and already I heard Jack Layton on the radio mouthing off his favourite phrase:

Mr. Harper doesn’t like to play like that: it’s my way or the highway with him

Where have I heard this before?

Since Harper met you on 2 out of your 4 demands, isn’t it YOU who does not want to play? Seems to me that Harper met 50% of your demands, but you won’t play until 100% of your demands are met.

Seems to me, Jack, it’s YOUR way or the highway.

h/t Cam @ Ottawa Citizen

So the budget’s out. Billions and billions in spending and tax cuts. I would like more tax cuts than spending, but hey, we’re in a minority government and we can’t just do it our way. (I would also do away with 230 million for the Arts, but we all know how a measely $48 million worked out in the past).

This budget is obviously heavily geared towards appeasing the Liberals: moderate tax cuts, investments in jobs, subsidies, low income, infrastructure. It has nothing for the NDP because, well frankly, they would vote it down regardless, and they didn’t bring any suggestions to the table, so why would there be anything in there for the NDP? The Liberals didn’t bring anything official to the table, but at least they let everybody know what they would like in it, so I guess the CPC watched the evening news and got the message.

Layton, who sported a green tie matching his green brain, turned it down without even reading it. He didn’t like the fact the Throne Speech was less than four pages (he would rather drone on and on and on and waste a whole day on reading it) and so the budget couldn’t be much better. “The bad stuff in there is not good, and if there’s good stuff, we don’t trust them to actually implement it” is a wonderful stance to take Jackie! Has anybody ever told Jack the role of the opposition is not to just oppose everything the government does?

Jack wants his stuff in the budget, or he’ll vote against. I guess it’s “My Way or the Highway” for Jackie.

Iggy meanwhile, said he had to look at the polls sleep on it to see if the budget was good enough, and today he came back with some changes. He likes the budget, but it didn’t implement all of the Liberals suggestions, so there’s a blackmail ultimatum on the table.

Iggy wants his stuff in the budget, or he’ll vote against. I guess it’s “My Way or the Highway” for Iggy.

Gilles just dismissed it right out as “there’s nothing in there for us”, meaning no money for Quebec specifically, and as such, he can’t vote for it.

Gilles wants his stuff in the budget, or he’ll vote against. I guess it’s “My Way or the Highway” for Gilles.

It seems the only one not going the “My Way or the Highway” route is Harper, wich is ironic of course, since he’s the only one being accused of doing just that.

While the mercury in Ottawa got stuck overnight at -32 (I hear it is going to be -38 over in Calgary), a senior Environment Canada scientist is blasting the federal government for causing a “public embarrassment for Canada” by preventing him from organizing a world gathering of experts on global warming. Don MacIver is the director of the Adaptation and Impacts Research Division at EC and was chairing a committee for the WMO (World Meteorological Organization) at the UN climate change summit in Poland, the same summit where Elizabeth May is peddling her Global Warming For Dummies book. Senior bureaucrats scrapped the trip in a cost-cutting measure. I agree, sending our “scientists” to false UN summits on subjects that don’t exist is not in the tax payers’ best interest. And if Elizabeth May is there, it can’t, by definition, be good for the taxpayers. According to Ms. May, delegates from other countries were “puzzled” by the cancellation of our committee chair’s address, and were left “wondering why it got cancelled” (that’s quite the “public embarrassment”). Earlier in the week, May was heard saying people at the summit had ”burst into tears” when they heard Harper had prorogued parliament.

I guess what I am trying to say is that Ms. May is more of an embarrassment to Canada than any cancellation of any speech ever will.

This all comes on the heels of a report that melting polar ice caps could actually help the fight against global warming. Apparently, there is excessive plankton growth in the sea areas that are now ice free, creating a huge carbon sink.

And Jack Layton just can’t give up.

For all you boomers out there:

The country is facing a recession, people of all stripes are cutting back on their expenses, some are losing money on their RRSPs, gauging (more like fleecing) at the pumps, people are losing jobs left and right, yet the Liberals, NDP and Bloc are against capping their salaries, cutting their expense accounts and want to hold on to their entitlements.  “We must work together to make this parliament work for the Canadian people” has changed to “I don’t want to give up my $1.95 per vote and a pay hike”. Thanks Jackie, Stephane and Gilles. Glad you’re working for us. Glad you’re chippin’ in.
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Yes, I received another email from my good friend Jack Layton this afternoon. After he chalked up his “historic gains this election”, he sat down with Mr. Harper and told him how to fix this economy thing, and, he says, he hopes Harper can put aside his petty partisan ways and listen to him. Jackie hopes Mr. Harper mentions the following suggestions in his throne speech:

• Cancelling the scheduled 2009 unconditional corporate tax giveaways;
• Investing in the new energy economy to create jobs and fight climate change;
• Investing in a national training strategy;
• Cracking down on the banks receiving government support but still charging outrageous credit card and ATM fees;
• Protecting pensions and RRSPs so that Canadians can sleep at night knowing their retirement is safe and secure.

Jackie, don’t get me wrong, these are good suggestions. Really good, but I don’t think in this time of economic uncertainty that ATM fees are really all that important. Or fighting climate change. Or national training, whatever that is.

All throughout the letter my good friend Jackie mentions me and my family and how he wants to help us. All we have to do to weather this storm, is to “stick together and put family first”. On three occasions in the short letter my pal Jackie tells us how to accomplish this: by giving him some money. Just $20. That’s enough. But give ’em more money!

My buddy Jackie is going to help me and my family weather this economic storm by taking more money out of our pockets!

I am richer for having such a good friend.